So I have a little less than an hour to give you my “Man Challenge Monday (#mcm).”
Guys – Don’t say stupid stuff!
Now I know that’s like saying to our wive’s “Don’t buy anything when you go to Target!” It’s practically impossible, because. . . well we do say stupid stuff and often. Just today alone I could tell you of more than one occasion where I said something to her, and immediately I was slapping my internal forehead.
Month’s ago, I was reading in 1 Samuel about a guy named “Elkanah.” This fella had two wives and one was mean to the other one. The “other one” was a woman named Hannah and she was super sad because she couldn’t have children. Well one day, Mr. Don’t Think Before You Speak, says to her, (and I paraphrase) “What are you so sad about? Aren’t I better than having 10 sons?” Now my imagination, pictures this guy sitting in his boxers and his belly hanging out of his tank top, he’s practically bald and grossly overweight and he’s looking at his wife and saying, “what are you so upset about, when you got all of this, Baby!”
Okay so probably not at all like the real picture, but still . . . Come on Elkanah! What were you thinking?
As guys, we go straight for the fix. We try our best to offer a solution to the dilemma’s our wive’s are facing, whether its with the kids, their job, their appearance, their whatever it is. But if we don’t stop before we speak we’ll end up saying something really stupid,
So how do we work at not saying stupid stuff:
- Try to see what she sees – It may seem small or insignificant to you, but if you try to see from her vantage point, you may save yourself from saying something you have to apologize for later. The house may not be as messy as she thinks it is, but if she’s cleaned it just yesterday, and the kids have lived in it for even an hour, all of her hard work appears, to her, to be in vain. But before you ask, “Well who was watching the kids while they made the mess?” Consider her point of view and go help pick up the living room.
- Just listen – Sometimes you don’t have to say anything at all. Just let her vent, cry, get it off her chest, and tell her that you love her, or that your sorry she’s feeling that way, and rub her back or maybe even leave her alone for a few minutes but just listen.
- Recognize when you do say something stupid – Call it what it is before she does. “Man that was a dumb thing to say, wasn’t it? I’m sorry babe.” And then resort to #1 or #2.
As a bonus #4 you can always do what I try to do pray Psalm 141:3:
Lord, set up a guard for my mouth;
keep watch at the door of my lips.
So there ya have it gents. With 39 minutes left in the day, I challenge you this week to work hard at not saying something stupid.