B E H I N D / T H E / B A R

First –  I am no expert at being a great husband, a great dad, or even just a great man for that matter.  Secondly – I also know that “#mcm” has a different meaning than what I imply in this and future posts.   However, as a man I believe I, and other men, need a place to talk about areas in our lives that need to be better.   With that in mind, I offer you my first Man Challenge Monday (#mcm) post,:

A couple of weeks ago I read a great post from Tim Willard wherein he talks about his renewed resolve to be a better husband  & dad. Go check it out.

Out of the gate Tim vows. . .

To love big, and stay small. Doing what I need to do to keep the humility of Christ ever in my heart.

Wow, that first swing hits me dead between the eyes.

Humility doesn’t come easy to most guys.  Its easier to love small, and to get a big head. However,  if we don’t love big, our wive’s and kids will inevitably look for more love from other places and that’s not a risk I’m willing to take.  Futhermore, if we act as if we’re all that, then they will see right through me, they always do.  There’s nothing that will instigate an eye roll like a dad who’s full of himself, puffed up, and unauthentic.  But even worse than an eye roll is a wounded relationship between an arrogant husband or dad and his wife and kids.

Loving big is serving, giving, listening, even when its inconvenient, seems unfair, or isn’t easy.  Loving big, requires intentionality.  Loving big is loving with sincerity and authenticity.

Staying small, is hard.  It means not fighting every fight.  Its not outrunning your family but walking with them.  Its laying aside the “I can’t be bothered with small stuff” mentality and putting yourself in the position to be bothered with the untied shoe, the broken toy, or the sealed jar that can’t be opened.  Here’s the thing, if I don’t stay small then they won’t trust me to help them navigate through the big issues of life.

The key to this is embedded in Willard’s vow – “keeping the humility of Christ in my heart.” Ephesians 5:25 says, “For husbands, this means love your wives, just as Christ loved the church. He gave up his life for her.”  Am I really willing to give up my life for her? For them?  If not, then I cannot love big, and stay small.

I wish I had this mastered.  I feel so convicted with every stroke of the keyboard.  So today, I make a choice to do the same.  To Love Big, and Stay Small.

Am I the only one here finds this challenging?

How do you love big, and stay small?

I’d love to hear from you.  What does your struggle look like?  What do your wins in this area look like?